Jealousy
by mon-petit-pois
Summary: After an incident occurs, EJ wants to know what happened in Ziva David's past that made her and Tony so close.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: okay, this is the story I told you guys I would write about EJ and Somalia. Idk how its going to go from here, so just bear with me.

Jealousy. It's not an enjoyable feeling. EJ knows this from experience. And, well, so does almost every other human being to ever walk on this earth.

Truth be told, EJ was very jealous of Ziva.

Why does he care so much for her? He obviously doesn't want to date her, he has known her for years and has not made a move. So why is she jealous of how Tony looks at Ziva? His gaze holds intrigue and happiness, caring and protectiveness. And, dare she think it, love. This is what makes her want to know.

EJ really wants to know what is up with Ziva David. She is just another pretty girl, why is she different in Tony's eyes? Sure, she's an ex-Mossad assassin, but in her experience, this fact was a turn-off for men. Something had happened between them, EJ knew. Something had happened between her boyfriend and his partner.

That night, when they are eating dinner by candle light in his apartment, she asks.

"So, what's the deal with you and Agent David?" she asks nonchalantly, as if it is simply a conversation starter.

"We are partners, what do you mean?" he asks, confused. EJ sighs, realizing this may be harder than she first thought. She needed to get to the bottom of this. What had made him so protective of the Mossad ninja that obviously could take care of herself?

Why was she so important to him?

***

She is sitting at a bar, and she orders herself another drink, hoping to drown her sorrows in alcohol. How _dare_ Ray use her like that? How dare he? She trusted her heart to him, and the whole time he was only using her for work purposes. Grinding her teeth, she poured yet another shot down her throat.

"Ziva? What are you doing here all alone?" she hears a voice from behind her. If she wasn't half-drunk, she probably would have dropped kicked the man to the floor. But even in her drunken stupor, she was able to place that voice.

"What are you doing here, Ray. I told you, I do not want to see you again!" she growled without turning around.

"Ziva, please. I love you! I am sorry, I did not want to tell you earlier about my position on the Port-to-Port killer case, because I feared this exact situation would occur! Please, take me back." he begged.

"What, did you think you could just keep me in the dark forever? I would find out sometime, Ray!"

"I was doing what I thought was best for the moment! I love you too much to let you go!" he continued. And in her drunk state, Ziva decided, what the hell, I will just take him back.

"Fine."

"Fine what? Fine, we are back together?"

"I suppose," she mumbled.

"I should take you home, Ziva. You can come to my house, and we can celebrate!"

"You have a house?"

"I am renting an apartment."

"Sure. Sounds good," she smiled a little, and let him lead her out of the bar. He opened the passenger door for her, and she got in. They drove away, and to his house. Ray was beyond happy that he had her back, and now they were going back to his apartment to celebrate that, the way he likes best.

_Ziva PoV_, _0400_ _the next morning_

I am cold, and I am naked. I am completely exposed, and lying on the hard ground. I have no weapons. I do not know where I am. I know this feeling, and it scares the life out of me.

The only other time I felt like this was Somalia.

I can feel the presence of a man next to me. He must be Salim. The one who did this to me. I am not bound, I can fight back. I can get out.

But I am still terrified.

Quick as a fox, I attack. I pin him to the ground, and punch him in the face.

"Ziva! What the hell are you doing?" I can hear him call, but the words do not register. All I know is that I must leave. I stand up, and run for the door, but find it shut. Shut means locked. I have nothing to pick the lock with, so I don't even bother to tug on it. It will only make me feel more trapped.

Seeking protection, I run to a table on the side of the room. I find what I am looking for, a loaded gun. Why it was there, I do not know. I have nowhere to go, nowhere to run. I scramble to the corner of the room and take refuge. Now he can only get me from one angle, and if he tries, I will most likely shoot him.

"Ziva! Put my gun down, you crazy bitch!" he yells, angry. I am used to the names by now, he uses them all the time, some much worse. "What are you doing? I'm not going to hurt you, please, Ziva!" I hear the voice beg. Beg? Salim does not beg. But i pass it off as just another attempt to confuse me into talking.

He moves to the table and picks up a cell phone, and mutters urgently into it. I hope he is not calling the guards.

I do not know how long I am in the corner. All I know is that everything is a blur, and I must do everything in my power to keep Salim from hurting me again.

A/N: Please review, I don't know how good this was. I know Ziva must seem OOC, but remember she is drunk in the bar and still pretty drunk in the morning. And before you bite my head off about the EJ/Tony and Ziva/CIRay romance, I hate both EJ and Ray so they won't stay in those relationships for long:) sorry if u like them, but I like Tiva so...


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: here's the next chapter! Wow, I spent an entire night with my friend Keely working on the plotline! Okay, correction, keely wrote it. Basically all by herself, but we worked together! Haha thanks so much, Keely! I can't tell you how much I appreciate it, I actually know whats going to happen for once! So, tell me what you think! A lot of Bitchy EJ and Evil Ray in this chapter! It was fun to write... haha

He has absolutely no idea what is going on, all he knows is that his girlfriend has completely lost it. Finally, she has gone insane. She's curled up in the corner, shaking and mumbling nonsense words, pleading with him as she aims her gun at his head. What had he done? Nothing, he had simply given her the night of her life. And how did she repay him?

By punching him in the face and pointing the barrel of his own gun at him.

He has no clue what has happened to her to make her go crazy, and delusional, but he intends to find out. If he ever lives to see another day, that is. The odds right now aren't looking too good. Ray knows that the only way to get out of this was with help. Thinking fast, he pulls out his cellphone and presses speed dial one. Who will pick up, he has no idea. But whoever it is will probably be able to help him.

"Zi, it's oh four hundred, what's so important? You know not to wake a DiNozzo from his beauty sleep," came a groggy voice from the other end of the line. Ray's eyes narrowed.

Tony DiNozzo.

Why wasn't _he _speed dial one? He's her boyfriend! What was so important about DiNozzo? And what was with that nickname? Zi? Really?

Taking a deep breath to calm himself, he reminded himself that DiNozzo was her partner. Of course, he would be number one on her speed dial, she takes her work very seriously, more so than her own person life. Just out of curiosity, he pulled up her speed dial list.

He was number seven. Ray narrowed his eyes in anger and jealousy.

"Ziva? You there?" Tony asked expectantly.

"DiNozzo." Ray responded, trying his best to keep_ too_ much venom from seeping into his voice.

"CIRay? What the _hell_ are you doing at Ziva's apartment? She broke up with you!" Tony yelled at him.

"Well we got back together."

"Ziva would never agree to that."

"She was tipsy."

"That explains that, but why the hell are you calling me?"

"Because I..."

"Spit it out, Cruz."

"Ziva needs your help."

"What? What have you done with her, you bastard!" Ray rolled his eyes at this.

"Nothing. She woke up, and started freaking out. Tackled me, punched me, grabbed my gun, which is now aimed at my _face_ thank you very much."

"Wow. Looks like she's sober!" Tony joked. Ray narrowed his eyes.

"Look DiNozzo, she's delusional, mumbling and pleading with me, saying all sorts of stuff."

"What kind of stuff? Is that her, in the background?" Tony asked, worried. He had heard murmuring in the background, and didn't know what it was. Good, Ray thought. I've got his attention.

"Probably. And I don't _know_ what she's saying, DiNozzo! It's all in different languages. Well, most of it."

"Most? Then what _was _in english?"

"I... I think one time I caught her saying 'Please, don't Salim, not again.'" Ray recalled.

"_Shit! _I'll be right over, don't you lay a _finger_ on her, you hear? And i'm not worried about you losing a finger, which _will_ happen if you bother her, but about _her _wellbeing." He was nearly yelling in the end. Of course, Ziva chose that moment to raise her voice.

"Please, _please! _Salim, stop!" she nearly screamed. Ray heard Tony gasp.

"I will be there in five, don't bother her."

"She's got a gun trained on me, what do you think I am, an idiot? And we are at _my_ apartment, not hers." Ray reminded him. He heard Tony grind his teeth.

"Where?" He asked. Ray gave him his address, and Tony hung up. Slowly, Ray put the cellphone back in his pocket as to not spook his psychotic girlfriend into pulling the trigger.

EJ was woken from her peaceful slumber by a shrill cry of a phone. She had enjoyed their night together, it was magical as always. It rang once, twice, but stopped before it could ring again. Tony must have picked up. She rolled on her other side and closed her eyes, not wanting to get up.

"Zi, it's oh four hundred, what's so important? You know not to wake a DiNozzo from his beauty sleep," she heard his voice, and her eyes snapped open and ears perked up as soon as he heard her address the person on the other line as 'Zi.' She never got a cute nickname! And Tony and Ziva weren't even together and he was already calling her Zi?

"Ziva? You there?" Tony asks. Great. The worry in his voice was almost as bad as the 'cute little nickname.'

"CIRay? What the _hell_ are you doing at Ziva's apartment? She broke up with you!" Ha! So it was Ray, not Ziva! This should be interesting.

"Ziva would never agree to that." Came his voice again. Agree to what? Listening to a one sided conversation was getting more and more annoying with each comment.

"That explains that, but why the hell are you calling me?" Ugh, explained what?

"Spit it out, Cruz." she heard the venom in Tony's voice.

"What? What have you done with her, you bastard!" Now, EJ was getting angry. She was having a wonderful night, and now Ziva comes and ruins it! Now _her_ Tony is all worried about her, his protective side was kicking in for Ziva again. EJ had a feeling that he wouldn't react this way if something happened to _her!_

"Wow. Looks like she's sober!" He said, laughing. EJ went back to being confused.

"What kind of stuff? Is that her, in the background?" she could detect the obvious change in his voice, now it held genuine concern. EJ somewhat hoped that what he heard in the background was screaming.

"Most? Then what _was _in english?" he asked, keeping the same, worried tone.

"_Shit! _I'll be right over, don't you lay a _finger_ on her, you hear? And i'm not worried about you losing a finger, which _will_ happen if you bother her, but about _her _wellbeing." Tony went back to yelling, but she knew deep down, he was panicking. And that made her even more pissed, although she was happy to know that something really _was _wrong with Ziva! EJ knew this was bitchy, but she couldn't help the feeling. Ziva had a place in her boyfriend's heart she would never have, and EJ really needed to know what place that Ziva had. She needed to know what she was up against.

And then EJ heard the screaming, coming from the speaker of the phone. She couldn't make out what was being said, but whatever it was made Tony gasp and leap off the bed, pulling on his pants.

"I will be there in five, don't bother her." she heard his stern voice, this time from his dresser.

"Where?" he asked, then she heard the phone shut, then he retreating footsteps. A door open, a door shut, and somewhere in the distance, a car start. EJ sat up in the bed, fuming. How _dare_ he? He left, to go see some psycho bitch, without even telling her or saying goodbye!

What is wrong with him? What is _up_ with Ziva? EJ loves Tony, Ziva had her chance! Now it's her turn, and she is being cheated out of it!

Secretly, she hopes that whatever is going on with Ziva will keep her away from _her_ Tony, forever.

A/N: Please please review! I got so many alerts for the last chapter, a lot of reviews... I need to know what you think! So tell me:D Thanks to everyone who alerted, favorited, and esp. reviewed the last chapter! Love you all!


	3. Chapter 3

He wasnt sure what exactly was going on with Ziva, but he knew it couldn't be good. It was obvious that she had never told Ray about Somalia, otherwise he would get what was happening.

God, Tony hated that man.

He called himself Ziva's boyfriend, but on the phone he acted like he didn't give a crap about her! He probably didn't. Just thinking about Ray made Tony's skin crawl. He seemed unfazed by her screams. He didn't care about her at all. Only for his stupid, filthy life. Tony secretly hoped that Ziva pulled the trigger on him, although he knows that will only end with her in one of two places: prison or a mental ward.

He heard exactly what she had screamed. In truth, it had scared the crap out of him. The panic attacks stopped after the second month back. No one except him ever knew they existed, mostly because they came in the night. She would call him, he would come over, comfort her, and they would fall asleep together. Eventually, he realized that the nightmares and memories that haunted her were not stopping, and the best way for both of them was to just stay the night together. So that's how their tradition started, she would go over to his house for dinner, they would watch a movie, then fall asleep, his arms around her. The nightmares stayed away, and she would not freak out every time something went bump in the night. After Paris, that's when they decided she was well enough to sleep in her own apartment. She did, and he hoped that the reason she didn't call was due to lack of _reason_ to call.

So as far as he knew, they had stopped. Now he is wondering if they every did, or if she just thought calling him would make her seem weak.

No one ever knew how close they were. It was just them, they kept it out of the office. No, it was nothing romantic, never romantic. Rule 12 was there for a reason. They were just like... family. He had been there for her during those months that no one had known except him that she was suffering emotionally.

So now, Tony was a bit shocked. What had brought this panic attack on? This one sounded only as bad as some of the ones her first few nights back, if not worse..

Hearing her screams had hurt him, it had been like someone drove a stake through his heart. He had heard those screams before, screams of terror and horror... and agony. He had always been the one to calm her down after a particularly bad nightmare, or when something reminded her of those horrible months that summer. And now, instead of him, Ray was there, and he was doing nothing but try to save his own ass. He didn't care about her.

Tony did.

So why was she Ray's girlfriend? She deserved someone who would treat her well and love her no matter what and comfort her in her time of need, not screw over her and run away with his tail between his legs. That was exactly the type of man Ray was.

Tony pulled up at the address of the apartment building that Ray had given him. The elevator took to long, so he took the stairs, two at a time. He arrived at apartment 5B in no time. The door was locked, but he found a key under the mat. Letting himself in, he made his way to the bathroom, following the noises he heard, which didn't make him all that optimistic. He could hear panting and small, choked sobs coming from a room with a closed door, so, slowly, he made his way to it. Carefully, he eased open the door and peeked around it. The sight nearly broke his heart.

It was Ziva, but it didn't look like the tough ninja assassin he had grown to love. She looked like she did all those nights before their trip to Paris, where she would wake up not knowing where she was. She was in the corner, knees pulled up to her chest protectively. Her hair was a tangled mess hanging around her tear-stained face. She was completely naked and was shivering, wether from cold of fright he did not know. Her arms shook as she held the gun in front of her. The expression on her face was of pure terror, uncertainty, and confusion. She looked torn between aiming the gun at Ray, or Tony. Tony knew that she was delusional, not seeing everything in front of her. He knew that she must be in Somalia right now, and he knew he had to make sure she was okay.

"Please, leave me alone!" she cried pathetically. She continued to speak, begging, it sounded like, in more languages that Tony did not understand. He caught the occasional "Salim" thrown in there more than once.

Slowly, he approached her, calming speaking to her.

"Zi, it's me. Put the gun down, it's all going to be okay. Just relax. It's me, Tony, and that douche-bag's not Salim, it's Ray. I'm not going to hurt you, I promise. Please. Just hand me the gun. Please..." he said softly, gently. He extended his hand carefully so as to not make her feel threatened by him. She still shook, and he eyes widened.

"Tony? No, you have to get out of here! He will kill you, Tony! Don't risk your life for me! I am not worth it... not worth it." she begged, her voice decreasing in volume towards the end. By the time she stopped talking, she had zoned out.

"No, Ziva. You are here, in D.C., with me. There is no threat anymore, Salim's dead. C'mon, Zee-VAH! Snap out of it! You are safe, sweetcheeks." he assured her. And he could see the difference in her demeanor the second he says her name by dragging out her name, like he always does during their playful banter in the workplace. He eyes widened even wider when he called her sweekcheeks. As far as he knew, he is the only one who ever called her that.

She looked at him, and he could tell she was seeing him and her surroundings accurately for the first time that night.

A/N: sorry it was short! Please review, next chap should be up very soon!


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: some offensive language in this chapter, but it's cuz, well, its EJ. And in this fic, EJ's a bitch. And I know, this isn't really how Ray would react, but for the sake of this fic lets pretend it is, and he's some jealous, nosy, two-timing bastard. Kk? Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! Probably wont be updating until maybe friday! Soo many tests this week, a book report which I have yet to read the book for, and something for round two of Nationals of Science Fair. Yeah, and wednesday's my birthday. Most of the stuff is due on thursday. Just my luck. Oh well, next week is standardized testing, which means no HW! So u will prob get a lot of chapters next week, just a heads up.

"Hey, Zi." he whispered, slowly sliding down next to her. Her breathing was calming, and she had given Tony the gun, but the tremors were not subsiding. If anything, they were getting worse. She had finally come out of her delusional state, but was horrified at what she had done and not everything had registered yet.

Tony's arms around her shoulders, pulling her close to him. His warm body was pretty much the only thing she was aware of. His touch was so familiar and comforting, she couldn't help but feel safe. She leaned her head into his chest, listening to his slow and steady heartbeat. She just sat there in Tony's arms, shaking, waiting for it- whatever _it _was- to pass. Her eyes remained open, barely blinking, and staring at nothing.

When her tremors did not stop, Tony began to realize that they were from cold, and not fear. She was naked, after all.

She seemed to remember it, too.

"My clothes..." she began weakly, embarrassed. It was not as though Tony had never seen her naked, but more from the feeling of being exposed. And cold.

It was a feeling she had come to loathe during her time in the desert. The days were unbearably hot, but when the sun disappeared on the horizon, so did the heat. That's normally when Salim would come.

Tony chuckled.

"I was wondering how long it would take you to notice that." he smirked, and shrugged off his jacket, draping it over her shoulders. It was much too big for her, and it covered all the vital parts.

"Are you okay, now?" he asked, warily.

"If you are wondering if I am sane, then, yes, I am." she answered. "I... just want to go home." Ray, who was feeling quite like a third wheel at this point, decided it would be a good time to interject.

"Anyone care to explain what just happened? How about you, Ziva? 'Cuz you seemed pretty eager to _shoot me_ just now!" he practically yelled. Ziva flinched. She was still pretty touchy.

"I am sorry, Ray. But it will not happen again, for I will not get back together with you. We were drunk, I was not in my right mind when I accepted. And... I don't know what just happened, I was hoping you could explain." she replied.

"You mean you don't remember _any of that?_" Ray asked, outraged. "And how _dare_ you break up with me! I gave you a great time last night, and this is how you repay me?" Ziva chose to ignore him, standing up and putting her arms through the sleeves of Tony's OSU letterman jacket, zipping it up. She grasped his hand, and turned to leave. His hand slipped out of hers, however. At first she panicked, but he was only freeing it so he could wrap it around her and lead her out.

"FINE! Get out of my house, you ungrateful woman!" Ray yelled, and kicked the wall. How _dare _he? Stupid, girlfriend-stealing _bastard!_ He just waltzes right in here and wastes no time proving to him that he knows Ziva better! Why did she calm down for him, and _only_ him? What had he done?

At first, Ray had just written it off as nothing. But now he knows there is something serious going on with those two. Something in their past had made them this close. Why couldn't it have been Ray instead? Why couldn't he be in Tony's position?

And how dare _she? _After everything he had given her, this was how she repays him! Not to mention the fact that she had just gone completely and utterly _insane_ and she didn't remember it! She belonged in a mental institute.

Ray sank down on the bed with his head in his hands

"Where are we going, Tony?" Ziva asked as he started the car.

"Your apartment." he replied, pressing down on the gas.

"Tony..." she begins. She wants to thank him, but she was too embarrassed.

"Zi, why didn't you tell me the panic attacks didn't stop?" he inquired.

"They did stop, Tony! They stopped after Paris! Was that what that was? A panic attack?"

"Yeah, I think. It was exactly like the ones you used to have after S... After we rescued you. But, Zi, is this the first one since Paris?" he asked.

"Panic attack, I think so. Nightmares... not really."

"When?" he asked, almost afraid of the answer.

"Not too often. Occasionally after a really hard case, normally one that reminds me of... it. But the infrequency only makes it worse when they _do_ come."

"But this is your first panic attack?"

"Yes, I believe so."

"So what triggered it?"

"I... I don't know." she answered honestly.

"It's okay, it will come back to you."

"I'm not I want it to, Tony."

"True, sorry."

"It's alright."

"So you are fine now?" he checked.

"For now. But... it will come back, Tony." she told him.

"I know, and I will be there when it does." he assured her. Content, she fell asleep.

She was being restrained, again. This time, it wasn't by the normal wrist restraints, but by a rope at her chest. She was also painfully aware of the fact that she was half naked. This had not happened since... Well let's just say it was not enjoyable. This sent fear and horror throughout her body, terrified. She couldn't breath. Her lungs were constricting... Suddenly, there were hands on her. She tried to scream, but nothing came out. She could barely draw a breath. The hands continued to shake her, to pull at her hair, to caress her cheek in a way that only ever led up to one thing...

She gasped, and her eyes opened.

It was Tony. The hands belonged to Tony. Terrified, she began to struggle more.

"How could you, Tony!" she cried, sobbing. She was horror struck, that Tony would do this to her. He was Tony, and, dare her think it, _her _Tony. And he was... he was...

"What did I do?" he asked, concerned, the hands withdrawing from her. She let out a sigh of relief, as she could breath again. And suddenly she realized she had this all wrong.

Tony was not going to hurt her. He was eyeing her with a pained look. He looked worried and torn. He was torn between touching her, comforting her, and giving her her personal space.

She looked around, and took a deep breath to calm herself.

The rope at her chest, holding her back, was nothing more than the seat belt of Tony's car. His hands were not attacking her, nor assaulting her, but trying to wake her from the clutches of her nightmare. She exhaled, but it came out broken, and she began to shake again. Tony didn't know what to do, but he went with his gut and unbuckled her seatbelt and picked her up, carrying her bridal style to her apartment. She closed her eyes and sobbed into his shirt, feeling quite helpless and unlike herself. She felt so comfortable in his arms, and safe. He reached her apartment and pulled out his key ring. Using the key Ziva had given him when he had come to her apartment so often after Somalia, he opened her door. He walked into her room and gently laid her down on her bed. He tried to unwrap his arms, and stand up, but he clung to her and cried out when he did. She was hysterical.

"Don't go, Tony," she whispered. "I..." she tried to tell him, but she couldn't, just couldn't admit it.

"You what, Zee-VAH?"

"I... I need you to hold me, like you did after I came back." she whispered. She said it so softly Tony couldn't be sure she had said it, but he knew she did.

"Okay," he replied, trying hard to fight his smile. "But first, there is something I need to do. I will be back in five." he assured her. After a moments hesitation, she finally let him go, and he went to the other room to call EJ. He hit speed dial seven and waited for her to pick up.

"Tony, what's taking you so long? Your apartment is lonely, and I'm getting cold." she complained, seductively. Tony sighed.

"Sorry, EJ. Not coming back tonight. You can stay the night at my apartment and go home tomorrow, change for work. I'll see you then." Then Tony hung up, so he wouldn't have to listen to her complaints.

He walked back to the room to comfort Ziva, God knows she needed it.

How could he? He just _ditched _her for that slut! How _dare_ he? She had given him so much, and he just runs away to be Ziva's knight in shining armor. And he _hung up on her!_ NO ONE hangs up on her, if they want to live. She was being a good girlfriend, everything he could ever want, and now the woman he supposedly was just friends with had stolen him. He was no doubt with her right now, cheating on her. No doubt he was in bed right now, sleeping with her. She wouldn't put it past him. Ziva probably just faked the whole problem, whatever it was, because she was jealousy of her, of EJ.

They had no ordinary relationship. No one leaves EJ for just some other girl. And Ziva was just some other girl. So what was it that had happened to them, that made them this close? She hoped it was painful for Ziva. Maybe she got shot. Ooh, how EJ would like that. Maybe EJ could just take the initiative and do it herself.

Wow. Get a grip, she told herself. As much as she hated to admit it, she was jealous of that boyfriend stealing whore. She needed to do something about it, but she knew shooting her to her death wouldn't work. EJ would get fired, and that wouldn't work for her.

Whatever. If anything, EJ really needed to know what was going on with them. She wasn't going to just let some girl steal Tony from her without her knowing the reason.

Let the snooping commence.

A/N: please tell me what you think of this chapter! I really should be studying...


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: For those of you who have read Ten and a Half Hours, this chapter may seem a bit déjà vu. But I needed this for this fic to work.

She showed up at work before Tony did, which was not unusual. But she was really anticipating his arrival. If he arrived with Ziva she didn't know if she would be able to restrain herself from killing her.

The elevator doors opened, and EJ looked up from her desk. It wasn't Tony, or Ziva, though. It was Ray. Smiling, she realized that if she wanted to know what had happened last night, Ray was probably the man to ask.

"Agent Cruz!" she shouted. He turned his head towards her, and she beckoned for him to come.

"Yes?" he asked once he was standing in front of her.

"You got time?" she asked. She had a feeling this may turn out to be a long conversation.

"Yeah, why?" Ray asked, suspicious.

"What happened last night? Tony completely ditched me!"

"Yeah, they ditched me, too."

"So what happened?"

"I don't even know. Last night, I followed Ziva to a bar, to ask for her forgiveness, preferably when she was tipsy. She agreed, and we went back to my apartment... You know how it goes. Next morning, we wake up on the floor of my bedroom, naked, and she flips out. Starts screaming at me, grabs my gun. She cocks it and backs up to the corner. So, I'm freaking out 'cause I don't know what the hell to do! She'd never done this before, but then again, we haven't slept together before. She always insisted we 'wait.' Anyway, I picked up her phone, called speed dial one. And get this. It was _DiNozzo._ That's whose number one on her speed dial!"

"No way!"

"I'm serious."

"Well, they_ are _partners."

"Am I the only one who thinks it's more than that?"

"Not at all."

"And I don't know what's up with Ziva. It's crazy. One minute she's fine, next she's loco. She kept shouting things in different languages, but I did catch a name."

"Which was?"

"Erm... I think it was Salim."

"Arabic name."

"I know."

"Something is not right with her. And whatever it is, it's threatening our relationships."

"But the thing is, I'm sort of having second thoughts about our relationship." Ray mused.

"You are?"

"Well, yeah! She tried to kill me last night!"

"I see where you're coming from." EJ said. She respected Ray. He was sane, for not really wanting to date Ziva anymore. Not to mention, quite attractive. Not as attractive as Tony, but... Couldn't she have both? It's not like it was against her morals.

"Yes, well, I have to go. Vance needs me in his office, its about P2P. I will see you later, then?" he says, walking away. EJ winks at him.

"Of course," she says seductively.

The elevator grinds to a stop on the first floor. EJ sighs. She hates it when she is in the elevator with other people.

The doors open, and Ziva steps in, and upon finding the button for the squadroom floor already lit, she leans up against the wall.

It's all EJ can do to not murder her, right then and there. For taking away Tony. Jealousy was a terrible thing.

And then the elevator stops again. EJ goes to get out, but realizes they are not on any floor. And the doors are still shut. Suddenly, the lights go out, and the elevator is engulfed in black. The emergency lights aren't working.

"What the hell?" Ziva mumbles, and kicks the doors. They don't open, and suddenly, her breathing starts to escalate. She's trapped, with no way out. It's dark. Not an ounce of light. There is no getting out, she is helpless. The walls... they are slowly creeping in on her. She can't see it happening, but she knows it is. She can feel the space getting tighter and tighter and tighter, until she can't breathe anymore. No air is getting to her lungs. No light, no room, no hope...

And she submits to unconsciousness.

She can hear voices, somewhere. She wants to find them, but she is simply wandering without any sense of direction at all. The voices get louder, but she cannot see through the darkness.

"Is she going to be okay?" she hears a woman's voice ask. Abby. It's Abby. Abby was worried. She must get out of this empty nothingness and find Abby, put her mind at peace...

"I'm fine, Abby." she mumbles, finally finding her voice.

"Ziva! Thank God! What happened?"

"I do not know..." Ziva replied slowly. She remembered nothing after stepping in the elevator...

The elevator. It had stopped... the walls closing in... the blackness...

Crap.

"Shh, my dear. Calm down." Ziva heard Ducky say. She finally found the muscles that opened her eyelids. "It was a mild panic attack." Ziva's worst fears were confirmed when she saw EJ in the corner. She had witnessed it. Of all the people on the world to see Ziva break down! First Ray, now EJ?

The universe must hate her.

She sat up and jumped off the autopsy table. And she ran. She ran up two flights of stairs, seeking refuge.

She needs to get away, to think. Alone.

A/N: short, I know. But I wrote this in a hurry. Please review, they make my day! Oh and I wrote another fic, a oneshot, called You Found me...


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: So, here it is. Sorry, it took me a while. But anyway, I decided that the Ray I have created is just that. Someone I created. Cuz, really, the Ray from the show didn't strike me as the kind of guy that would do the things that I have made the Ray in this fic do. Just so u know, this isn't really the Ray we see on the show:)

Humilation. That is all she can feel, all she can think about. She locked herself in the bathroom stall, and curled up in the corner, breathing heavily. She needed to get herself under control! Her emotions were completely out of wack, this was her third panic attack in less than twelve hours, and two of those had been in front of the two people she would never want to see that vulnerable side of her.

Ray. And now EJ. Embarrassed didn't even even _begin_ to cover it.

But they didn't know what she had been through. They probably thought she was nuts, that she was weak and insane. She wasn't crazy, not the least. But they _didn't know that._ They had no idea the horrors she endured. She knew that the simple answer to this would be to just tell them what happened. That way they would understand and not write her off as a psychopathic lunatic that freaks out over the smallest things. Like what she did with Ray last night... They had never slept together before. She knows it sounds unbelievable, but she had told him to wait. She didn't think she could handle it.

She was right.

And the claustrophobia? And the fear of the dark? Those had never been a problem before, it was only the two combined that set off her panic alarms.

The door to the bathroom opened, and Ziva rolled her eyes. Of course she had been followed. She never got any privacy anymore. Now she got to be interrogated by the Wicked Witch of The East herself. Or was it the west?

Whichever.

"I know you're in there, David." came EJ's singsong voice.

"I do not want to put up with your crap right now, Agent Barrett." Ziva replied.

"_My _crap? I think you owe me an explanation!"

"How so?" she said sarcastically, standing up and emerging from the stall to go face her.

"Hello! You just _fainted_ in a freaking elevator, nearly gave me a panic attack, thank you very much!" EJ crossed her arms and walked up to Ziva, who laughed at that.

"What?" EJ asked, her forehead furrowed.

"I am just laughing at the irony and how you have got the whole situation completely... downwards." 

"Its _backwards_ and how, exactly, do you figure that?"

"_You _saying you had a panic attack in there."

"I was exaggerating a little."

"A little?"

"Are you indicating you just had a panic attack?" EJ asked, curious, leaning a little closer. _Finally, _she thought. _We're getting somewhere._

"I did not say that. Besides, I do not _faint._"

"Fine. You swooned."

"I do not know what that means, and I do not wish to find out. But I do not faint. Never in my life have I _ever_ fainted." Ziva informed her. But then she remembered. She _had _fainted. On multiple occasions. But it wasn't so much as _fainted_ as it was becoming unconscious. Which to most people would seem like one and the same, but if you have ever been shot and then beaten cruelly, you would "faint" too. EJ detected the uncertainty in Ziva's eyes.

"You're lying." EJ said, studying Ziva's face, her eyes, her expressions. Ziva's walls had been unknowing down. Quickly, she regained her composure and put them back up.

"It depends on how you look at," she said, with an air of finality that indicated their discussion was indeed finished. She pushed EJ out of her way and left her there, in the bathroom, pondering her words. What did she mean "how you look at it?" Whatever it was, there was something in Ziva's past. Something dark that she didn't want anyone to uncover. Whatever it was, Tony was in on it and it acted as a binding agent in their relationship. Maybe Ziva had done something bad... Maybe she had done something she was regretting now.

But EJ knew one thing. She would find out what it was. Her and Ray. They would make a great team. And maybe they could explore the whole _friends with benefits _thing, along the way.

…

Tony closed his eyes, and leaned his head back on the wall of the elevator.

"What do you want, EJ? Gibbs needs me to finish that report-"

"I want to know what happened last night at Agent Cruz's and this morning in the elevator." EJ insisted, as she leaned back on the railing.

"That does not concern you."

"I think it does. You _ditched _me last night."

"I know, and I will make it up to you."

"Fine. Starting with what happened."

"It doesn't matter! You don't need to know!"

"I think I do!" 

"It's not my information to share," Tony said, a little quieter.

"Oh really?" 

"Yes, really! I want to know why, after everything was settled with Ray, you went left _with _her and didn't come back to your apartment! Did you _sleep with her?_ Because, if it find out you did, I will cut your balls off in your sleep, you bast-"

"WHOA! Calm down! I'm _not _sleeping with Ziva!"

"Then why did you go back to her apartment!"

"Again, you don't need to know! That is between Ziva, me, our team, and a dead guy halfway around the world!" Tony instantly shut his mouth, knowing he had said too much.

"His name wouldn't happen to be _Salim, _would it?"

"How..."

"Agent Cruz said she was screaming it."

"You two have been going behind out backs?" 

"We want to know!"

"Want and need are _not_ the same thing, EJ!"

"I don't care! I am entitled to this information, you are my boyfriend!"

"You know what, EJ? I'm not sure what you are anymore!" 

"TONY!"

"End of discussion, Agent Barrett. This is not my story to tell. I don't even think I could." And with that, Tony flipped off the emergency stop button and exited the elevator, with EJ hot on his six.

"Tony, why do you care so much for her! Why is she more important than me!" Tony detected a hint of hurt in her voice.

"We are _partners!_ We have each others' backs."

"Why do you need to have her back?"

"_STOP DIGGING! _This does not concern you in any way, shape, or form!"

"Just you and Ziva, right? And Salim, whoever the hell he is. Probably some lover she had back in the middle east. Probably got herself pregnant, or something."

"I _cannot believe you just said that_! Salim was a freaking-" Tony cut off, realizing he was playing right into her hands. She was manipulating him into spilling the beans. "You almost made me tell you. But it doesn't matter. Ziva will tell you if she wants to, otherwise, stay the hell away from her."

"Fine." she said, sounding like a spoiled little girl. She turned around and stomped away.

…

Stupid Ziva. Why did she have to come in between her and Tony? She needs to find out what happened with Salim. Whatever it was, it wasn't good. It was the key.

And how would she find out? Well that was easy. If neither Ziva or Tony would tell them, they would investigate. First stop? That was easy too. Go through Ziva's history. Go through her medical records, paperwork. All of it.

But wait. She didn't have access to that! 

Thank god the CIA does.

Ray would be easy. He doesn't like Ziva anymore. She doubted he ever did. He was probably just using her. Which meant, that he was needy. He needed someone to be with...

She knew exactly what she could offer him in return for doing this. Plus, she would get a kick out of it too. Sure, Tony was an excellent lover, but he got boring after a while. She just wanted something new, if only for a while. Ray would probably help her even if she didn't offer herself to him, anyway. Curiosity is a _very _strong driving force. He is probably just as curious as she is. No doubt the entire building has heard about the little elevator fiasco by now.

So that's how she would do it. Use Ray. For both her, and for his, benefits. She would find out what happened in Ziva's past. Easy as pie. Smooth as silk.

She could do this. EJ giggled a little as she imagined a little diabolical laugh playing in the background. It fit the mood perfectly.

A/N: Please review! They mean so much to me...:D


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: I don't know how long it's been, but it's still been a pretty long time. Anyway, I sort of lost my inspiration to write after the season finale, which I thought was dreadful. Turns out, EJ _does_ have a heart. I actually began to fear for her life and not want her to die toward the end there. But I still hate ray and all his empty promises. Stupid box. Stupid guy. Stupid Ziva, dump him already! Anyway, im just going to remind you again, that the EJ and Ray in this fic are pretty much from my imagination, considering neither of them are really like this. Ray actually cares about Ziva, and i'm sure he wouldn't react like this. EJ isn't that evil, she would probably just demand answers. She probably wouldn't cheat on Tony... oh well. I'm sure you can all over look that, yes? Any way, sorry about the long A/N. Here is the chap.

"Hey," Tony said, as he jogged to catch up with Ziva. She had just emerged from the bathroom.

"What do you want, Tony?" she asked, annoyed. She really was _not_ in the mood. She knew she should not take her anger out on Tony, but he was the only one around.

"To talk." he said, as he came to a stop directly in front of her, blocking her path.

"About what? There is nothing to talk about," she said, attempting to push him aside. He did not budge, however.

"I'm pretty sure there is," Tony insisted.

"Like?"

"You haven't had a panic attack in at least six months, and now they have suddenly come back? Twice in less than twelve hours. I think you need to talk."

"Okay. Just not here, okay? I am not even sure I remember what happened," she whispered the last part.

"Alright. Tonight, my place?"

"Fine," she said, and pushed past him. This time he let her, knowing that this was as good at it was going to get for now.

…

She arrived on Tony's doorstep, sort of nervous. She shouldn't be, but all day she had been thinking about talking to him. She knew there was something crucial about last night that she was missing, but she couldn't seem to remember what it is.

And then the door opened, shocking her out of her thoughts.

"Tony," she nodded.

"Hey, Zee-VAH," he said, stepping aside so she could enter, "You can have a seat on the couch."

"Okay." she agreed. Tony studied her as she walked, wondering what she was thinking about. Whatever it was, it had made her tense.

"Whenever you are ready to talk, you can. I think I am entitled to know what happened last night and this morning. You are my partner, and I am supposed to have your back. But I have seemingly failed at my job," Tony began, sitting down beside her.

"You did not fail. You had no way of knowing."

"But I should have."

"No, Tony. Don't start blaming yourself."

"I was always there before! And now? Why is this different?"

"You were not expecting this. Neither was I." Ziva said softly. Then a scene flashed in her eyes, and she remembered.

"I made up with Ray. We were drunk, I would have never agreed to it otherwise." she whispered, putting her head in her hands.

"Made up like figuratively, or, you know... physically?"

"Physically," she sighed, ashamed.

"And that triggered it?"

"All I remember was feeling naked, exposed, in a strange place with a strange man."

"That must have been the trigger."

"I do not know..."

"Come on, Ziva. Think. You need this, to be able to feel closure."

"What are you, Tony? A blink?"

"I think you mean, shrink, Ziva."

"Whatever. I do not remember anything that was happening, just how I felt..."

"You can do it. Think back."

"I'm not sure I want to."

"It's okay, I'm here for you," he assured her. Since when had he become so... sentimental?

"_Ziva! What the hell are you doing?" He is confused._

"_Put my gun down, you crazy bitch!" He is yelling at her. Angry._

"_What are you doing? I'm not going to hurt you, please, Ziva!" He is nearly pleading now. Pleading for his life._

Ziva gasped, remembering, as the scene of what really happened flashed before her eyes. She knew now that it was not Salim who had called her that.

That uncaring, self-centered, _bastard!_

"He called me a bitch, Tony. A crazy bitch! He was yelling at me, screaming! He did not care about me! He only cared for his measly little life!" Ziva jumped up, and punched the couch. Tony was enraged, as well.

"ThatBASTARD!" Tony seethed, trying to stay calm for Ziva's sake. He noticed he was shaking. Knowing that she was going through a tough time and trying to control her emotions, he gently wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his chest, trying to calm her.

"Let go of me, Tony!"

"You need to calm down."

"Calm down? _Calm?_"

"Believe me, Zee-VAH. I am angry as you are.

"What else did he do...?" she asked to no one in particular, "I hate not remembering!"

"It's okay, Ziva. I think it's better that you don't remember."

"What, you _know_ how he reacted!" she jumped up.

"Not exactly..."

"Tell me, Tony."

"Okay... He did nothing to help, Ziva. He did nothing. He was not concerned about you, just the fact that you had a gun pointed at him. Ziva, please don't stay with him. I know you care for him but... he does not care for you. I'm sorry I had to be the one to tell you, but it is true," Tony told her, afraid of her reaction.

She sighed, seemingly calmed down now.

"I figured as much." She had hoped that maybe he was concerned for her, that's why he was freaking out, but she knew that it wasn't. She just knew. "He and I are done," she said with finality, collapsing on the couch.

"Why don't we watch a movie?" Tony suggested, knowing she needed a break, "Just like old times."

"I would like that," she leaned back against the couch, and relaxed, remembering the old times with her partner as they watched a movie on his couch together.

Just like old times.

…

"Ray! Hi!" EJ said cheerfully, pretending to be surprised, as she sat on the bar stool next to him.

"EJ? What are you doing here?" Ray asked, confused.

"I just needed a drink after a hard case. I'm surprised to find you here. I would have thought you would be with Ziva," she answered. Almost everything in that sentence was a lie. They hadn't just wrapped up a case, in fact they hadn't had a case in almost a week. She wasn't surprised, because she had followed him here.

And she knew he wouldn't be with Ziva, after what happened. Ray wasn't the type of person to be attracted to someone with serious character flaws like that.

"I'm... not sure about Ziva. I can't be around her anymore without worrying she's going to pull her gun on me and go all psycho again," he sighed, taking a sip out of the club soda. He hadn't been in the mood for alcohol, and he knew once he started he wasn't going to be able to stop. Showing up tomorrow at work with a hangover was not the best idea.

"I know what you mean. She's beginning to freak me out," EJ agreed.

"Speaking of which, what happened in the elevator? I know she passed out but that's all anyone would tell me. She has been avoiding me all day."

"One minute, she's fine. The elevator is fine. Then the elevator stops, the lights go out, and she starts to freak. She's breathing heavily, to the point where it sounded like she was gasping for air. She kicked the door a couple of times. Then it all just stopped, and I heard a thump. I didn't know what it was until the elevator started working again and the lights went back on. She was on the ground, it looked like she'd collapsed. She was pale, and sweaty. It was really weird, and when she woke up in autopsy, she just sprinted out. I tried to get her to tell me what happened, who Salim was, why she freaked in the elevator, but she just wouldn't talk. I think she almost told me, but she caught herself."

"I don't think I can continue our relationship. She is just too... unpredictable. Normally I like a girl who is spontaneous but this... this is just plain old bazaar. I don't think I can handle it. But I still want to know what happened, and I feel like if I break up with her now, I will never know."

"You know, her telling you is not the only way we can figure it out. I am dying to know as well. Both times she had her little panic attacks, she was with one of us. That makes it our business."

"I agree. But what do you mean?"

"You are the CIA, Ray! You have contacts, links... You can figure it out! Find her personnel file, that's got to be an interesting read," EJ snorted a laugh.

"That is... a brilliant and deceiving plan," Ray said, setting down his glass. He needed to think about this. "You know that could get me fired," he pointed out.

"Then we won't get caught," she smirked, "Come on. Don't tell me you don't want to know what is up with her! Plus, you and I could have a little... time alone. That would be good, don't you think?" her voice took on a seductive tone towards the end."

"I'm not sure if that's a good idea, EJ. I do not plan to break up with her, I still want to fix it. She may be crazy, but she is _really_ good in bed. I don't want her to find out if there was something going on between you and me."

"Oh please. Don't think she and Tony haven't been getting together behind our backs. Why else do you think they have been seeing each other so much! Why else was she number one on his speed dial and the _only_ one she seems to be able to trust! She is cheating on you, Ray!" EJ tried her reasoning on him.

"They are partners! Of course they're close."

"Oh, it is more than that. Have you seen them? They're like magnets. She moves, he moves. She blinks, he blinks."

"That's really cliché," Ray pointed out, gulping the last of his drink. He knew she was right, but admitting it out loud would make it seem too real.

"That's beside the point. The point is, that they are cheating with each other."

"Two wrongs do not make a right."

"Two halves make a whole."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"Yes it does, it's simple math" she laughed.

"Not that. _How _does halves and wholes relate to wrongs and rights." 

"I don't know. Guess I'm just a little... tipsy."

"You haven't even had anything to drink," Ray chuckled. "Although, I would love to see you drunk..."

"And why is that?"

"Why do two halves make a whole?"

"Now _you_ are the one not making sense. Besides, you can't answer a question with another question."

"Says who?"

"You are doing it again..."

"What?"

"Answering everything with a question!" she rolled her eyes.

"Am I?"

"You are _insufferable!_" she threw her hands up I the air.

"I'm kidding, EJ." he rolled his eyes, too.

"Whatever. Are we going to do this or not."

"I guess Ziva doesn't have to know about any of this. Will you keep it from Tony?"

"Of course. There's nothing wrong with him."

"According to your... gut, he cheated on you."

"I don't know that for sure."

"Okay, now you are in denial?"

"Well, _he_ keeps denying it," she pointed out.

"So then you really have no idea if they are sleeping together, then?"

"Not really, no." 

"So all that was just made up to get me to sleep with _you_ and use my resources to find out what the heck is the matter with Ziva and what happened to make her and Tony's bond strong?" he raised his eyebrows. 

"Are you saying you don't want to sleep with me?

"That's not what I said. Besides, I want to know what is going on with Ziva, too."

"So we are good, then?"

"Very good. We are brilliant," he said, seductively, taking her hand and getting up to leave.

"Well, it was mostly my plan..." she reminded him, hopping off the bar stool.

"That is true."

"So just to get this straight," she began as they walked out of the bar and headed to Ray's car, "We are going to share something very special tonight. We aren't going to break up with Tony or Ziva. We especially aren't going to _tell_ Tony or Ziva. Then, tomorrow, you are going to get a hold of everything there is on Ziva David and inform me of all of it?"

"I think you have it straight, Erica Jane Barrett."

"Good," she smirked, and got in the passenger seat of Ray's car. Mission accomplished.

With pretty good benefits, too. She had Tony, and she secretly had Ray doing both doing her dirty work and for her own personal... pleasure. It was perfect.

In a twisted, severely messed up sort of way.

A/N: If you hate EJ and Ray, leave a review! If you can't wait til Tony and Ziva get together already, leave a review! If you are looking forward to Palmer's wedding, leave a review! If you hated the season finale, leave a review! If you watch Bones and nearly started hyperventilating at the end of the season finale... guess what?

Leave a review! Hehe:)


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: The reason you guys get a chapter so soon is mostly because of the amazing reviews I got:) it was like every time I refreshed my email, there was another one! And another! You guys are awesome! So, as a treat, here is the next chapter! Nice and long, too!

She found him in the break room the next night, fiddling with his hands nervously.

"Ray, we need to talk." Ziva's voice was full of anger.

"I know," he said, standing up to face her.

"Let me go first," she ordered. He knew not to mess with her when she was in this mood, so he let her.

"Do not think I do not remember what you said that night, how you reacted," she began. "Because I _do. _You did not care about me! You have never cared about me! I realize that now."

"No, Ziva, no! You got this _wrong!_ I never meant to hurt you! I was panicking, you had a gun trained at my head! I didn't mean anything I said, I would have helped you, but I was afraid of being shot! Please, forgive me!" he pleaded with her.

"It is too late to apologize, Ray," she said, and turned around to walk away.

"Wait! Please! I have always cared about you! I still care about you! You are still the Ziva I have always known! Nothing has changed! I still see you the same way, Ziva. Please, can't we forget that night ever happened? I understand that you don't want to tell me what happened. I get it. Just, please, please, take me back?" his voice had hints of begging in it.

"I... I do not know if I can do that, Ray," she said softly, turning back to him.

"Please, just give me another chance, Ziva. I promise, I will make it up to you. Maybe over dinner tonight? Then maybe we can skip dessert..." he said, suggestively. Suddenly, Ziva became very angry.

Skip dessert? Was he _absurd?_ What, did he not remember the last time they had made love?

"Are you _insane?"_ she shrieked, pulling her arm away forcefully.

"What?" he asked, alarmed.

"Do you _not_ remember the last time we 'skipped dessert,' Ray! You are _insufferable!_" she yelled at him.

"Wait. What does that have to do with your little freak out the other night?" he asked confused.

"It has _everything_ to do with my little 'freak out!'" she shouted, enraged that he still didn't get it.

"Wait. So your saying a little sex was the problem? Wow. Your more pathetic than I thought!" he scoffed. Ziva's face grew livid.

"I can not believe your nerve!" 

"Well, tell me what the problem is, then! You are _crazy! Mental! _You freak out for no reason at random times! I can't put up with someone with this many problems and irrational fears!"

"I am not crazy, you bastard! You would have PTSD too, if you had been held and _tortured_ for three months in the middle of the freaking desert! And my fears are not _irrational! _You would be afraid of tight and dark spaces if you had spent weeks on end in a small, dark, windowless cell! You would be afraid of waking up naked with a man if you had been continually raped every single day! You would have nightmares if this had happened to you! Nightmares that you wake up screaming from every night! You would have panic attacks too, Ray!" she screamed at him. She knew she would come to regret telling him this, but he needed to know.

He was speechless. Words eluded him. Everything he had once thought was wrong. Everything. He felt terrible for everything he had said.

After a minute of silence from him, Ziva couldn't take it anymore. She stormed out of the break room, leaving a stunned Ray behind her.

…

"EJ. We need to talk," Ray said, pulling up a bar stool to sit next to her. This bar had become their meeting place of sorts, just to make sure they weren't seen leaving together.

"What is it?" she asked, worried.

"I found out what happened, EJ. It's not pretty." EJ could tell he was upset.

"What happened?" she asked again. He didn't seem to hear her.

"Oh god, I feel so _guilty..._" he said, putting his head in his hands.

"What happened!" she practically yelled. He told her everything Ziva had told him.

"Oh my gosh," EJ whispered. She felt the guilt that Ray was no doubt experiencing creeping up on her, ready to consume her, but she would not let it. She fought against the feeling, unwilling to feel bad about pushing Ziva.

"I know. I can't believe it," Ray mumbled.

"Ray. Did she tell you anything else?"

"No. That was it. Those were her exact words."

"Well there is definitely more to the story than that. Are you sure she didn't tell you where it happened, who did it, when, anything?" 

"No. That was all she said about it."

"We still need to find out more. I want to know why this affects Tony. I don't see how it affects him, this was strictly her problem," EJ stated.

"We know all we need to know, EJ." 

"That is not the whole story! Aren't you curious?"

"I'm not sure I want to know."

"Come on. Just pull her personnel file. Find out more!"

"No, EJ. We can use other methods. I don't want to get fired. You can squeeze it out of Tony or something."

"Fine! We'll just do it the hard way!"

"Come on, Erica! Try to understand..."

"Just... give me a minute okay?" she suggested. After a few minutes, she sighed.

"We will do it your way," she submits.

"Thank you. I'm sorry we had to fight. What do you say I make it up to you, huh? Back at my place?"

"Deal," she smiled, and hopped off the bar stool, heading to his car for a repeat of last night.

…

"Hey, what are you doing here? It's 2100, Zee," Tony asked, approaching her desk. He had just come out of a meeting with the director.

"Just finishing up some paperwork," she answered, trying to keep her voice from quavering. She didn't look up.

"That's a load of crap, Zee, and you know it."

"I will not be able to sleep tonight so I figured I should just stay here and actually do something productive instead of moping around my apartment," she explained.

"And why won't you be able to sleep?"

"Forget it, Tony," she sighed, still not looking up.

"Can't do that, Ziva. Something is bugging you. You need to tell me what the problem is," he said, pulling up a chair and sitting beside her.

"It is nothing, Tony." Tony suddenly remembered what she had planned to do today.

"Did you break up with Ray?" he asked, softly, taking her hand.

"Not exactly. But I felt the break up was implied," she chuckled once, without humor.

"Look at me, Zi." She did. "Now. What happened?"

"He tried to make up with me. He said he cared. He pretended he cared," she began. Tony could see the moisture beginning to gather in her eyes, "He said... he said he wanted to 'skip desert.' Those were his exact words."

"Wow. He really can't read between the lines, can he?"

"Anyways, I yelled at him, asked him how he could be so naïve, and he just kept asking what sex had to do with my little 'freak out.' He said... he said it was because I couldn't handle it, that I was pathetic. He called me crazy... So I..." she trailed off.

"You what, Zi? It's okay, you can tell me." 

"I told him what they did to me in Somalia. He knows, Tony. He knows what they did to me." A single drop of water slid down her cheek. He wiped it away.

"Isn't that a good thing, Zi? I mean, now he knows that you aren't insane. And hopefully, he's feeling guilty too."

"It's not like that. God, I'm so embarrassed... He doesn't care about me! Why should he care about what happened to me? But I just... I want him to love me, Tony. I want him to love _me!_ I mean, all he cared about was _skipping desert!_ It was like that was the only reason he ever went out with me... Oh my gosh. He used me..." she realized. Tony was seething with anger at this point.

How could he? How could that bastard just _use _Ziva and throw her away once he was done? Tony was going to kill that son of a bitch...

"Tony, calm down," Ziva ordered him. She noticed he had begun to shake.

"That _bastard..._ I can't believe he tried to make up with you!"

"Tony, it is okay! With any luck, I will never see him again! Just... calm down, okay? You do not need to be worried about me."

"Yes I do," he said softly, and pulled her into a hug.

…

He walks out of the elevator, whistling. He had slept well last night.

"I need to talk to you, Tony." He hears a voice say, then he is startled by being pushed back into the elevator.

"EJ! What are you doing?" he asks, warily, as the doors shut and she hits the emergency stop button.

"We need to talk," she explains.

"Obviously. What about?"

"Ziva."

"Why Ziva?"

"Because. I want to know why she reacted how she did in the elevator. And don't act like you don't know, because I know you do."

"For the last time, EJ. I am not going to tell you. That is Ziva's tale to tell."

"Then what about that night when you left me without any explanation at all?"

"Again, not my story to tell."

"Then what is?"

"Can't you just forget it, EJ?"

"Are you sleeping with Ziva?" she asked, out of no where. Tony was taken aback.

"_Why_ would you think I was sleeping with Ziva?"

"Well you seem to care about her an awful lot!"

"Can't I just care about her? Why does that mean i'm sleeping with her?" 

"Because. People don't just care about each other. There is always a reason."

"So that automatically means I'm sleeping with her?" he asked, incredulously.

"Not exactly."

"We are just partners, EJ! It's our job to worry about one another, to have each other's backs!"

"So then her being captured and tortured had nothing to do with that?" she asked.

"What... How the heck did you find out about Somalia!" he shouted.

"A little birdie told me. Don't think it's that hard to find out! Look, I don't know what's up with you and her, but if I find out you lied to me..."

"I'm not lying to you, EJ!"

"Well, then, tell me your involvement in the whole 'Somalia' fiasco!"

"We are done here," he states, outraged. He flipped of the emergency stop and the doors opened.

"Tony-!" she tries to stop him, but it is too late.

He's gone.

…

How could he have let this happen? She was everything he had ever wanted, minus the PTSD. How had he let her go?

Ray regrets it, now. She was beautiful, kickass, and amazing in bed. And he had ruined what he had. Sure, his little thing with EJ has been fun, but he needs Ziva back. Not want, _need._ He _needs _to make things right.

So that is why he dares to approach her the next morning. She is standing by the plasma, looking at a picture of what was probably their latest suspect.

"Ziva?" he gets her attention. She doesn't look at him.

"What do _you_ want?" she asks, venom obvious in her voice.

"To make up."

"No way in hell, Ray."

"Oh come on. Give me a chance!"

"Chance my ass. That's what you said last time! I'm tired of all your empty promises!" she said, remaining calm.

"Ziva... Please!" he pleads with her.

"No ray. N. O."

"Please, just think about it!" he begs.

"Go away," she says, a warning evident in her voice.

"Alright. Just... Think about it," he turns around and leaves.

Meanwhile, EJ had been watching from her desk, green with envy, and full of hate toward Ziva. Losing Tony to her was bad enough, but _Ray!_? She had been _sure_ she had talked him out of ever seeing her again! And now, she is losing two men to Ziva David.

She hates this. She hates feeling insignificant, like the back up plan. Because that was exactly what she was. She was Ray's back up plan. Not that she really cared about Ray, she was only using him, but it was more of the fact that he found _Ziva, _the battle torn assassin with PTSD, more desirable than her. She wants to kill Ziva, but knows she shouldn't. She doubts she could kill in cold blood.

But then again, jealousy is a powerful thing.

A/N: I got an _insane_ amount of reviews to my last chapter! I love you all! Please review again!


	9. Chapter 9

EJ could not stand it anymore. She could not stand thinking that she was losing two men to this insignificant foreign woman. She had to do something about it.

She could take Ziva. She was a good fighter, no doubt better than Ziva. There was no way that Ziva was going to get away with stealing the only two important men in her life. If she wouldn't stop, EJ was going to have to take matters into her own hands and talk to her herself.

And so that was why she marched up to Ziva in the break room, ready to fight.

"Hey. We need to talk."

"I am not telling you anything. It is none of your business what happened to me. Just let it go, alright. I am fine," Ziva told her firmly.

"Cut the crap, David. I know about Somalia," EJ said, venom in her voice. Ziva was shocked. _How did she find out?_

"What... how... Did Tony tell you?" she asked, confused.

"It doesn't matter how I know. It matters that _you_ are interfering with _my relationship!_" EJ screeched.

"And _how_ exactly, am I interfering?" Ziva asked with incredulity.

"What do you mean 'how am I interfering! You know damn well how you are interfering! You are _sleeping_ with my _boyfriend!_" EJ yelled. And she lost it. She lunged herself at Ziva, catching her off-guard.

"What the _hell?" _Ziva shouted, as she was tackled by EJ. She threw her off of her, punching her in the face, and stood back up. But EJ kept coming.

Why would EJ think that she and Tony were sleeping together? Tony was her _partner!_ Sure, they spent a lot of time together, but she has been having panic attacks! She has been on the brink lately, and Tony was the only one who could calm her! Who knows why that was? They just had an unnaturally close bond. They had been through so much together, and the thought of losing him had made them closer. She supposed that to a third party, it would seem like they were together (Nora Williams seemed determined that they were a perfect fit) but they were only partners. Why do people automatically jump to those conclusions?

And then a thought crossed Ziva's mind that she never would have thought would.

She loved Tony DiNozzo. She cared about him, more than she should. She wanted to protect him, to keep him from being hurt. She wanted him to be there when she was having nightmares, when the memories caught up with her. She did not want to hurt him!

But he and EJ were together. She knew she could not hurt Tony, it would be cruel. And if she harmed EJ... that's exactly what she would be doing. Hurting Tony. She couldn't do it. She could not hurt the man she loved.

He seemed to love EJ. Hurting EJ would be hurting Tony.

She remembered how she had felt when she had busted open her apartment door to find Tony laying on the ground next to a dying Michael Rivkin. Losing Michael had hurt her, and she noticed that this situation was almost exactly reversed. She wouldn't put Tony through that pain.

She realized all this while she was flipping EJ onto her back. Knowing she had already caused more damage than she could fix, she backed to the corner.

"Stop," she said. EJ, who was still shell-shocked that Ziva could _take_ her in a fight, stood up slowly, still aching from the body slam.

"Why?"

"I do not want to fight you," she replied simply.

"Why not?"

"That is not important. How about a truce?" Ziva suggested. EJ had to repress the urge to roll her eyes. She didn't give her enough credit.

"Fine," EJ agreed. As much as she wanted to fight Ziva, she still had a plan.

"Do not tell Tony about this, EJ. Just between you and I?" Ziva asked, a hint of a plea in her voice.

"Fine. You and I." Ziva nodded, satisfied, and turned to leave. Just as she was about to walk out the door, EJ called, "On one condition." Ziva sighed and turned back around.

"What?"

"Back. Off. Tony." she said sternly. It broke Ziva's already fragile heart, but she nodded. She couldn't hurt Tony.

…

Sad did not even begin to cover how she was feeling right now as she sat at the bar with her head in her hands. She was too late. She had finally admitted her feelings for him to herself, but it was too late. He was taken, she had taken too long. If only she could have realized it sooner...

And so she sat, drinking alone, wishing he was there with her. She was so lonely, she had lost both of the men that she cared about in less than a week. All because of _EJ._ She used to at least have a relationship with Tony, but she needed to keep her side of the deal with Barrett. She knew she couldn't hang out around him like that anymore, the temptation to tell him how she felt would be too great. Instead, she would have to keep this new revelation to herself.

She could never tell him she loved him.

…

"EJ, what happened?" Tony asked, worried when she showed up at his doorstep for dinner with a bruise on her cheek.

"I walked into a... door," she lied, remembering her promise to Ziva.

"Okay..." Tony replied, not really believing her. "Come one in."

"What's for dinner?" she asked.

"Oh, just my famous lasagna."

"I love your lasagna!"

"I know, that's why I made it," Tony said, smiling his charming DiNozzo smile and pulling out a chair for her to sit in. The table was set for two with a candle in the middle and champagne in a ice bucket.

"What's the occasion?"

"It is the one month anniversary of when me met!"

"You are _really_ desperate for an excuse for a fancy dinner, aren't you?" she laughed as he got the dinner out of the oven. He just smiled.

That smile made EJ fill with joy. Finally, she was with Tony and Ziva would not be coming and interrupting any time soon! It was just her and him, just like it should be.

Well she was sleeping with Ray also, but Tony didn't know that.

She came out on top. EJ always came out on top.

…

What was with her? He couldn't seem to figure it out.

They had been on great terms yesterday! And now, suddenly, she was avoiding him? She only talked to him when necessary, never returned his quips and jabs. The playful banter between them that usually occurred quite often was strangely absent. Tony swore he could hear the crickets chirping in the background.

This had ben going on all day, and Tony was worried. He had let him comfort her yesterday, why is she suddenly ignoring him? What had he done this time?

This was upsetting him. It hurt him, that she refused to communicate with him anymore. It reminded him of how they were after Tony had killed Michael. He flinched when he made that comparison.

He hoped she would get over it. He knew she would, eventually, but it still made him mad that she refused to confront him! He had a right to know what was wrong. The only reason he did not go to her himself to ask was he was afraid she would tackle him and put her Sig to his heart again.

She just needed time, he was sure of that. She would confront him eventually.

He wondered why he was so worried about her. It's not like she was his girlfriend or anything. EJ had accused them of sleeping together in the elevator, but they were just close. He worried about her as a partner, that's all.

EJ.

She was his girlfriend. They were together. He was painfully aware that he had been neglecting her lately, and he knew that he had to try to make up for it. He had attempted last night, but he knew he would need to keep it up if she were to ever forgive him.

So he put the Ziva-issue on the back burner for now, and he brought his girlfriend up to the front.

…

She was so happy. Her plan had worked! Tony was treating her like a princess, making her dinner every night, driving her home, and he hadn't seen him "flirting" with Ziva in their usual way since the two women had fought. EJ's bruise was slowly fading. She could tell Tony was dying to ask, but he didn't. He was always such a gentleman.

Then, she had the Ray thing on the side. She had the best of both worlds. She doubted Tony suspected a thing, either. She and Ray were happy, she and Tony were happy, and Ziva was alone.

Now, the only thing she had left to do was to find out what _exactly _Tony had done in Somalia.

A/N: It's a shorty, but my mom is yelling at me right now. Sorry. Next chapter will be up soon! That is, if you review! Ah... bribery. Such a beautiful thing.


	10. Chapter 10

Depressed did not even begin to cover how she was feeling tonight. She had no one left. She sat at her desk, burying herself in paperwork and trying to forget about... him.

"Ziva..." she heard a voice say, and her head snapped up. Upon seeing who it was, she turned back to her work

"What do you want?" she sighed.

"I am not giving up on you, Ziva," Ray insisted. "You have been acting unusual lately."

"So?"

"_So,_ you are lonely! You need somebody and I would love to be that somebody!"

"You just do not give up, do you?" She was seriously thinking about slugging him. How hard was it to take a hint?

"If you give me a second chance, I promise I will behave myself. I will be a perfect gentleman I promise."

"You want me to come over?"

"For dinner, that's all," he promised. She could hear the sincerity in his voice.

"I..."

"Please, Ziva. I was stupid, and scared. I let you slip through my fingers when I should have held on to you with all I had. One more chance, Ziva." Ray was practically begging now. She had never heard him beg before.

What better thing did she have to do tonight? She could go with him, have dinner, at least she would not be alone. Being alone tonight would surely sadden her anyway. What did she have to lose? 

"I will come for dinner. But that is it, Ray, only dinner," she warned. Ray gave a triumphant smile.

"I will not let you down, Ziva. Not this time."

…

"It is too late for you to drive home, Ziva. You had too much to drink," Ray insisted. Dinner had been lovely, followed by a whole lot of champagne. Too much, in fact. She was a little... what was the word? Flipsy?

"I 'an drive m'self home, Ray," she slurred. Ray rolled his eyes.

"Not in your wildest dreams. You are sleeping here tonight, in my bed."

"I 'ought you said you would be a gentleman? I 'oubt you would be able to do that with meeeeee in the bedddddd."

"No, I will take the couch. I promised I would be a gentleman and I intend to keep that promise."

"I will take da couch," she insisted, and collapsed on the couch, pulling up the blanket. "'Night."

"Goodnight, Ziva," he rolled his eyes, and disappeared into the bed room.

…

Her internal alarm clock woke her the next morning, groggy and with her head pounding. _Great,_ she thought. _How much did I have to drink last night?_

Looking around, she realized she was not in her apartment. How the hell had she ended up at Ray's last night? Oh wait. She had agreed to it.

Sighing, she slid off the couch, accidentally taking the couch mattress with her. She groaned and stood up, meaning to place it back on when something caught her eye.

Something shiny, which threw the light every which way. An earring. A beautiful, sparkling, dangly earring that she recognized instantly.

Filled with a sudden anger, she forgot about the couch cushion and grabbed the earring, inspecting it. There was no mistake. This was _exactly_ what she thought it was, and it could only mean one thing.

She walked over to the counter and grabbed her keys, swapping them for the earring. Ziva snuck out of her cheating ex's house, and headed straight to her car to get the hell out of there. She needed to breathe.

That bastard. It wasn't bad enough that he had abandoned her in her time of need, but he was now seeing her partner's boyfriend? How long had this been going on? Had Ziva really fallen for this act?

He is repulsive. How did she not notice that he was sleeping with her partner's girlfriend?

She was almost glad she went to have dinner with him last night. She now knew EJ's dirty little secret, and she could expose her for who she truly was. A lying, cheating, bitch.

But how could she do that without breaking Tony's heart? If he truly loved EJ, how could he ever forgive Ziva for ruining what they had?

However, what if EJ were to break his heart? That would be her fault. She could have stopped it before it got too bad...

It wouldn't matter, she knew that. Even if she decided to keep it to herself, she would never be able to look at Tony in the eyes, ever again. She had to tell him, she had to.

But he would never forgive her.

She would wait for the opportune time. He would tell him at the best time possible. Or, she could simply just let this play out.

Whichever came first, she decided.

…

A persistent beeping noise pulled him out of his slumber and back into reality. He rolled over and smacked his alarm clock, shutting it up. Yawning, he stood up and stretched. There was something he was supposed to remember... what was it?

He got dressed and brushed his teeth, walking into the kitchen to grab some coffee. He was stopped short at the sight of his counter, however.

And he remembered what he was supposed to remember.

Ziva. Ziva had been here, but had left. And she had discovered something, too.

EJ's earring. They had looked everywhere for it, but had never been able to find it. Apparently, Ziva had done the job.

And now she knew.

He had blown it, he had completely blown it. She had given him a second chance, and it was ruined now. He was so stupid, he couldn't believe this was happening. He and EJ had been so careful, dining at restaurants Tony and Ziva never went to, taking cabs home so no one would be able to identify her car at his apartment... But now that was all out the window.

He grabbed his keys off the hook on the wall, and went as fast as he could to go find Ziva. He needed to think of a cover story, and quick.

…

He catches sight of her red mini cooper near the park. Knowing that this had to be her, he stopped the car and parked next to her, getting out and craning his neck, trying to find her.

After five minutes of searching, he gives up. Remembering that he didn't have coffee this morning, he heads over to the coffee stand a little way away.

And then he saw her. She was paying for her coffee at the stand. Must be fate, he thought to himself.

Sneaking up on her, he grabbed her shoulders and forcefully turned her around. Her coffee fell to the ground.

"Ziva," he greeted, out of breath.

"I know about you and EJ, you cheating bastard," she seethed, trying to keep her anger in check.

"I know you do, but Ziva, I never cheated on you! We were broken up, we weren't together! I can date who I want!" he insisted, pulling her away from the coffee stand. They didn't want to make a scene.

"You may not have cheated on me, but you were sleeping with the woman who is dating my partner. You knew she was taken, and yet you still slept with her! Why?" she demanded, still very angry.

"I forgot-"

"Don't give me that bullshit, Cruz. Don't even think about it," she turned to walk away, when he grabbed her wrists and pinned them to a tree, kissing her forcefully. She struggled for a minute before successfully pushing him off.

"I love you, Ziva!" he insisted.

"NO you DON'T! You love making love to me, that's IT! You used me, you son of a bitch!" she yelled, full blown angry. And she backhanded him, splitting his lip.

"_That_ was for Tony," she snarled. Then she kneed him in the groin. "And _that_ was for using me."

He had betrayed her. He had not kept his promise.

She has had enough empty promises.

A/N: again, sorry about the short chapter but I felt this covered a lot. Reviews, por favor! I have been getting so many, you guys are awesome:)


	11. Chapter 11

"So you enjoyed last night?" Tony asked, as he and EJ were walking through the park to get coffee.

"Oh, very much so. I hope we can do it again sometime."

"Well, you are my girlfriend I believe it is my job," he laughed.

"I am glad that we can finally be together without any interferences. It's nice really..." EJ continued to talk, but Tony was no longer listening. He was more interested on what was going on not even a hundred feet away from them.

Ziva and Ray were having a very heated discussion, she looked angry, and even a little hurt. He watched as Ray grabbed Ziva's wrists and pinned them above her on a nearby tree, forcefully kissing her.

"...And I was thinking maybe we could... Tony are you listening to me?" EJ realized Tony was no longer paying attention, and noticed what Tony was looking at. Ziva had slapped then kicked Ray, and Tony was no longer by her side. He was running in the direction of the young couple, one bent over in pain while the other stood seething above him.

_Crap._ She thought. She ran after him, knowing the truth could come out.

"Tony! Wait!" she called. But he did not listen.

"You don't lay a _hand_ on her, you understand me?" Tony yelled at Ray, shoving him. Ray, who had already lost his balance, toppled over onto the ground. Tony went over to Ziva.

"Are you okay? What happened?" he exclaimed, pulling her into is arms. To his surprise, she did not fight him. He had actually thought she was angry with him, that's why she refused to talk anymore.

"Why don't you ask EJ?" she yelled in EJ's direction, who had just caught up with them. Ray was now standing beside her, fully recovered, wiping blood off his lip and glaring at Ziva. Tony pulled her out of his embrace to stare at her.

"What do you mean?" EJ asked, beating Tony to the punch.

"Oh, you know _damn well_ what I mean,_ Special Agent Barrett._ Missing an earring?" Ziva growled. EJ's eyes narrowed.

"You dare accuse me-!"

"Oh yes, I dare. Because it is _true!_ But the real question is, how dare _you!_ You have no idea how lucky you were, and you just throw him away like yesterday's trash!"

"I didn't throw him away!"

"Oh, well, it is worse that you kept him as a little side-toy!" Ziva shouted.

"I'm lost. Who's the toy?" Tony asked.

"EJ has been cheating on you, Tony. With Ray," Ziva blurted out. Tony's mouth fell open.

"She's lying! It's not true, Tony! Would I lie to you?" EJ asked, putting on her best innocent face. Tony looks at Ziva and sees nothing but sincerity and rage in her face.

"Ziva wouldn't lie to me," Tony says with certainty.

"Well she _did!_"

"How about you, Cruz? Where's your say in this?" Tony asked, outraged and confused. Ray shrugged.

"Just give it up, EJ," he sighed.

"What? No, Tony, he's kidding, right Ray? You love Ziva, you wouldn't betray her!" EJ tried to push him in the right direction.

"Ziva was nice while she lasted. But then she went all psycho bitch and I decided it was time I found someone else. Of course, you don't take your foot off the boat unless the other foot is firmly planted on the other, am I right?" Ray explained. Tony's felt his blood begin to boil. He wrapped his arm around Ziva, who's hurt showed plain on her face. "Plus, a few extra weeks of sex with Ziva wasn't so bad, either." Ziva couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't stand how objectifying Ray was. She couldn't believe she had fallen for his act.

So she ran, angry tears pouring down her cheeks.

"What the hell, you two! We are _through,_ Erica Jane Barrett. You sicken me! Go back to hell, where you belong! And you, _Ray,_ you just broke her heart! After everything she has been through, the last thing she needed to hear was that she was just your play-thing! She is traumatized still, and you made it nothing but worse! I'll be lucky if she ever trusts a man again!" 

"I knew there was something going on between you two! What is it with Somalia, Tony? What did you do that was so_ special?_" EJ's voice sounded mocking.

"You wanna hear what happened, do ya? Fine! You know what she's been through, I know you both do!I don't know how it is for you guys, but when someone we love is in danger we tend to go after them! Except it was different for us, we thought she was dead in the bottom of the ocean! So, we go on some crazy-ass mission to avenge her supposed death! I didn't expect to come out alive, I expected to die killing the man that killed her. I _wanted _to die! Because she wasn't _alive!_ We got captured, and I ended up tied to a chair. Salim, the _terrorist_, comes in and tries to interrogate me, but when I don't cooperate he drags in a hooded figure and throws it down in the chair across from me. Could you imagine my surprise when it was _Ziva,_ alive, in front of me! She was bruised, deathly skinny and pale, and bloody! She looked like hell but at least she was _alive!_ Have you ever seen someone that you thought was dead, _alive in front of you!_ But then you realize that even though she is alive, you are too late? That you have been given this second chance, but then you realize your time is up and you are going to die together? That that second chance had been wasted? How would _you _feel, when a bullet from your boss's sniper rifle suddenly kills the man threatening the life of both of you? That by some miracle, God has decided to give you a _third_ chance at happiness? How would you feel when you get back, and realize that all is not well, and the reason that she has bags under her eyes all the time is every night she wakes up screaming because she thought she was _back there?_ And then you realize that they had broken her, that she had given up. And she tells you that she wanted to die. That she still feels as though she doesn't deserve to live! How would you feel when she flinches every time you touch her? And then when you read her medical file, and find out that there were signs of _repeated_ sexual assault and that she will most likely never be able to have kids? I asked her about it, and had to excuse myself to throw up afterwards! You're a woman, EJ! How would you feel if you were raped everyday for three months by strange men that did nothing but hurt and oppress you? How would you feel if one day, you wake up naked on the cold hard floor next to a man in a foreign apartment? Would you think that they had come back? Would you aim a gun at him? Would you get mad when you find out that the man that supposedly loved you had called you a crazy bitch? How would you feel when he called you a psycho bitch to your face? She has been hurt by too many men in her life. Congratulations, Ray, you just made the list. But you wanna know what happened to the _last_ boyfriend that used her? I put four in his chest." Tony gasped for air at the end of his speech, and took off to find Ziva. She was in need of comfort, that he knew. He needed to be there for her.

He found her on a park bench, curled up with her legs up to her chest and face buried in her knees.

"Ziva?" Tony panted. She looked up, and wiped at the tears running down her face.

"What?" she sniffed.

"Talk to me," he practically begged.

"He is just like all the others, is he not? He is just as bad as Salim and his men," she cried. Tony didn't know what to say to that, all he knew to do was to wrap his arms around her.

"He may be, but I promise you, I am not. Needless to say, I dumped EJ. It is you and only you now, got it?" he assured her. She nodded. He paused for a minute.

"I love you. I have been given so many second chances, I have been given second chances of my seconds chances of my second chances with you, and I think it's time I took the hint. I don't want to be apart from you anymore," he admitted. After his lengthy speech back there with Mrs. Bitch and Mr. Bastard, he was feeling particularly emotional. Ziva looked at him.

"Neither do I," she agreed. "And I love you, too"

And he leaned in and kissed her.

It had been a long time coming, they both knew. They had been leading up to this moment since they first met, starting with "_having phone sex?"._

"I am tired of pretending," she smiled, repeating his words of almost two years ago.

"So am I," he replied. Ziva didn't know why she was doing this now. She had just had her heart broken, what she needed now was a friend, not a lover. But she knew that Tony was both. Tony loved her, and was her friend. He would mend her broken heart and fill it with new love along the way. He was her protector. He stayed with her after Somalia, and pieced her back together then. He was doing it again, and he was glad to be. He cared about her more than words could express. He_ loved_ her. She loved him. They loved each other.

This day had started out as a disaster for her, and now suddenly, it had turned around completely. Funny how the universe seems to turn everything around on you, huh?

Not too long ago, it had seemed as if the whole world were conspiring against them. But they had beaten the odds, and come out on top.

A/N: Please review! Again, its short but this one covers a lot too and I think it might be the last one. I updated quick for you all! I am quite proud of that fact, actually! But the reviews I got were just so awesome... This might be the last chapter, it depends on if I feel it should be continued. If you want another, just tell me! If enough people want another chapter I will give you one!


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: Due to popular demand, here is the _real_ last chapter. It has been great, thanks for making this special for me as an author. It means so much to me. All of the reviews really were amazing, and I couldn't ask for better reviewers. Thank you all.

Dedication: This entire story is for Keely. 143! without you this story would not exist, or would just be a very confusing story at that. Thanks for being the one who took all my jumbled ideas and somehow managed to convert them into a story line. Love ya, girl :o)

She doesn't think she ever heard Tony express his emotions that much at once before. It shocks her. He really does love Ziva. She won't just be some fling.

Deep down, she is happy for them. But she is still hurt, that he would choose her over him.

But EJ understands it now. She understands Tony and Ziva's special bond. It was forged in the sweltering desert sun, when he came for her. It has become unbreakable, indestructible. She couldn't believe she hadn't noticed it before. They weren't just partners, they never had been _just partners_.

Of course, she can't believe she ever thought Ziva was just some girl. She crawled through hell, and still managed to come out of it a better person. As a human, she can't imagine the pain she had gone through. As a fellow woman, however, it was far more incomprehensible. No one should have to live through what she went through. EJ knew she had been nothing short of a bitch to her.

She knew an apology was in order. She just hoped that what she had done was forgiveable. EJ wasn't really that cold-hearted. She just thought she was in love. She was jealous.

She was only human, after all.

…

He is shocked. Is that really why she attacked him that night? She attacked him because she thought he was some rapist/terrorist?

Ray can't believe he has been so cold-hearted. He can only imagine what it would do to her to think she was being seen as a sex object once again. Sighing, he knew that there was no way she could ever forgive him for being such a jerk.

He knew he had to try, though.

"EJ, our thing is over," he stated, and pushed past her as he ran in the direction both Tony and Ziva had took off in. He heard her sigh.

"Agreed!" she called after him. He just continued to run, looking around for the couple. He came up behind them just in time to hear them proclaim their love for each other, and kiss. He smiled, with he sunrise in the distance it was truly a beautiful scene. He didn't want to ruin their moment, so he turned around. His apology could wait for another time.

As he turned around, however, he stepped on a twig. The couple sitting in the bench twirled around.

"What do you want, Ray?" Ziva asked, not even attempting to mask the venom in her voice.

"To apologize," he stated. "I broke up with EJ. I believe that goes without saying. I'm sorry for calling you a crazy, psycho bitch. I'm sorry for cheating, and I'm sorry for not understanding. But you have to understand, Ziva, I didn't have the full picture. And EJ... we all know she's manipulative. I now know she was only using me, but I think I was sort of in denial about it before." Ziva sighed.

"You are no longer a part of my life. I guess I forgive you. Now go, and do not bother us again, Ray," she said, and turned back to kiss Tony again.

"Goodbye, Ziva," he murmured, happy he was forgiven.

And so he turned and left, prepared to get on with his life.

…

"Ziva!" EJ called as she slid through the elevator doors just as they were about to shut. "I wanted to apologize."

"For?" Ziva asked. 

"Everything. Absolutely everything. I should have known you loved Tony, and it was selfish of me to be so controlling. Our little deal... I think it is safe to say that's off."

"I forgive you. I am grateful that you had the guts to apologize. I expected you to just ignore me for the rest of your life, and never mention it again," Ziva told her. She couldn't believe she was forgiving the very people who kept her any Tony apart, but if you really think about it, without them, she and Tony probably would never have admitted their feelings.

"I'm not sure if that's supposed to make me feel good or bad," EJ sighed, as the doors opened. Ziva just smiled and walked out, feeling happier than she ever had.

Tony was waiting for her.

…

"Abby!" EJ shouted over the music. Abby swiveled around in her chair. "You said you have something on the Safters case?" she prompted. Abby didn't reply. Instead, she stood up and turned off the music. Then she stalked over to EJ.

"I don't have anything. We need to talk," Abby sneered.

"What is this?" EJ asked, becoming suspicious as Abby advanced on her.

"_This_ is an intervention."

"An intervention of what?" EJ was confused.

"Your little _thing_ with Tony. It is messing with Tiva! Do you know how much_ time_ and _dedication_ I have put into this? Now you and Ray are messing it up. And I don't know if you know I know you are sleeping with Ray, but you know I know now!"

"Um... Tiva?"

"Yeah, it's like Bradgelina, except better! Tony and Ziva are both in denial of their feelings for each other, and it's about time it ended! You and Ray are keeping them apart, and it's time this bullshit _ended!_ Tony is a great guy, but if you don't see that and have the _decency _to be faithful with him, you don't deserve him at all! Now, you pass a little message on to Ray. The message is, if you hurt Ziva, beware of Gibbs. See, Gibbs and I have a process for people that hurt people we love. He kills them, and I hide the body and clean up all forensic evidence afterwards. Now, he breaks her heart, he answers to _us! _And I believe the same goes for you, Miss Erica Jane. You guys have no idea what she had been through. She doesn't need your crap," Abby took a deep breath.

"Abby, you're a little late," EJ laughs. She can't believe how devoted this team is to each other.

"What?" Abby asked, confused.

"This morning, Ziva found out about Ray and I. She ran to the park, Ray followed her. Ray forcefully kissed her, she... retaliated. Tony and I were out walking at the park at the time, he saw this, we both went over... Ziva spilled about Ray and I. She ran away, Tony gave us this lengthy, heartfelt speech about what happened to her in Somalia. Then he ran after her, and Ray ran after them. That's as much as I know," EJ explained. Abby was speechless. Once she seemed to have been able to regain her voice, she took off out the door. "Abby wait! One more thing!" EJ added.

"Make it quick," Abby replied as she hit the up button on the elevator.

"According to Ray, Tony told Ziva he loved her. And she told him it back. Then they kissed."

Abby's face broke out into a smile.

"You know what?" Abby laughed as she hit the close doors button on the elevator. "You and Ray may be cheating jerks, but I think it's because of you that Tony and Ziva are together. I may owe you."

The doors shut.

…

"I can't _believe_ you two didn't come straight to me and tell me when it happened! I mean I get that you probably don't want Gibbs to know right away, considering rule 12 and everything, but am I your friend or not?" Abby had just emerged from the elevator and, after making sure Gibbs wasn't in the squadroom, ran up and punched Ziva in the arm, then hugged her. She did the same for Tony. They were both smiling.

"Who told you?" Ziva asked.

"Ray told EJ, who told me," Abby explained.

"You two are dating?" McGee exclaimed, getting up from his desk. He walked over to Ziva and gave her a hug. "Congratulations! After all those years of Operation Tiva..." he trailed off as he walked over to go give Tony a congratulatory hug also.

"Operation what now?" Tony asked.

"Oh, nothing," Abby dismissed with a sing-song voice. "Oh, Timmy. It's so much more than just dating! Tony told Ziva he loved her! Then she said she loved him! Oh this is the absolute best day ever!" she continued to squeal. They heard a ding, and the elevator opened. Gibbs came out, and Abby automatically stopped jumping.

Gibbs walked straight over to Tony, and headslapped him. "You break her heart, I will kill you just like I did the others, got it?" Gibbs said, in all seriousness. He didn't even wait for an answer, just continued to head up to the director's office.

"How did he...?" Ziva asked, puzzled, emerging from behind her desk to go over to Tony.

"He's Gibbs. Who knows?" McGee replied. Ziva laughed, and stood on her toes to kiss Tony.

It was strange, really, how so many bad things could happen, and yield something wonderful, something beautiful. Perhaps it was only fate, and this was destined to happen. But it doesn't matter why it happened. It was meant to be.

It was perfect.

FIN

A/N: Sorry it was short, but this was more of an epilogue. Hope you liked the Abby part thrown in there. Considering this is the last chapter, please review even If you don't normally! I would like to thank all the people who have so diligently reviewed. I really hope you enjoyed this! Please review, you guys are amazing. Thank you all.


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